Wednesday, December 26, 2007

Define Success

I have successfully lived a day in the life of a veal calf. I walked 2 blocks and spent the rest of the day watching Dane and Natsumi make a turkey.

Photos will follow. I only have pictures of the turkey because it was so amazing that once it was carved and we were all eating it no one thought to take more photos of our lovely dinner party.

Remarkably Dane, Natsumi, Axel, Nat, Jen and I all ate nearly the entire turkey which according to Martha Stewart's calculations could have fed 12-14 comfortably. None of us are even chunky.

It just goes to show that choosing your friends according to their appetites works. Seriously, you don't want to hang out with anyone who can't eat a lot, you'll just leave hungry.

Monday, December 24, 2007


Merry Christmas everyone!

It has been one hell of a month.

Enjoy your families and whatever feast may grace your tummies.


Wednesday, December 19, 2007

funny things

I think of funny things everyday while I'm walking or doing something that prevents me from writing those thoughts down.

You're just going to have to trust me on this one. I'll be funnier the next time I see you than the last time I saw you...I've been working on it.

Saturday, December 15, 2007

passing time


It has been a long couple of weeks. We are getting closer to Christmas and it feels like a dramatic crecendo that is building with each day.

The first week of December brought my mother, a move, a mould problem, new furniture, fishes, a couple of fish deaths, longer Lark hours, loads of stories and not enough time to share them!

Also, I had possibly one of the very best steaks of my life last night. Pied a Terre Bistro is lovely, warm, welcoming and the filet mignon was so tender it was almost buttery. The menu there is really simple and unlike anywhere else in East Van. They don't mess around, it's steak frites, creamed spinach, a roasted stuffed tomato and your choice of sauce. Simple perfect food, delicious...go there!

The mother visit went alright. I asked her and her boyfriend not to come to the store during operating hours and they came by 4 times. Other than that I enjoyed seeing my mother. I worry because she smokes that we don't have a lot of years left to right wrongs and become closer.

Tuesday, November 27, 2007

I ask a question

The sun is shining, the mountains are glorious in the distance with snow caps glistening, the air is fresh and there is not one rain cloud in sight.

So I ask you this. Why is it that not very many people in Vancouver find all of the above enough reason to smile? So many grouchy faces!

It is my mission to smile enough to make up for all of the sour faces I see everyday.

Friday, November 23, 2007


I'm packing, getting ready to move to a new, bigger, brighter, quieter apartment. I pulled boxes out of storage that were packed with diaries, letters, photos and whole shit load of memories that, to be honest, hurt.

I've thrown them away. My bizarre obsession with archiving every thought I've ever had, every human interaction I've ever had, is over. I don't care anymore. Or is this blog proof that my need to archive is still strong!? Suirly squirly squirly I tell you!

I am so tired now. I did find some school photos of myself. The one with the pink velvet track top is priceless! I'll post it soon.

Monday, November 12, 2007

First animation ever

Here is my first animation ever. I made it for fun, and I hope you like it!

Monday, November 05, 2007

found news

Hey look, I found a post I started and didn't finish. Pictures!




I'm feeling super restless lately. My mind is on the next buying trip to New York which isn't until February. I'm am so excited about finding new brands and new inspiration for pictures, video's and even music. It's like I've exploded. I wrote and recorded 4 songs last week, learned how to add music to video clips and created the rough video below, found a new apartment all while still working my usual shifts at Lark.

So Dane and I are moving to a nicer, brighter, in suite laundry, little patio, QUIET apartment two blocks away from the store. It's all going well I must say. I do however have this feeling of impending there is a cartoon anvil above my head...or a grand piano waiting to drop.

Which brings me to my mother and her boyfriend visiting in early December. It will be nice to see her, but I can feel the neurosis slowly creeping up on me. I guess we all have varying degrees of neurosis caused by our parents.

Sunday, November 04, 2007

Video Test

I've been super busy learning how to use technology. Here is something I'm working on. I think once I get the technical side of things down I'll be able to make it pretty.

Incase the credits didn't take it's like this:

Music: The Gamines
Magic: Bag Tannis Hegan
& Me

I hope you all like it though it's a very rough draft!


Saturday, November 03, 2007

Hey Everybody!

I've had a few people request that I keep this thing moving. I just want you all to know ( Elaine, you're not the only one reading this thing!) that with Christmas coming up fast I have been super busy with the store.

Also, Dane bought Leopard for me and my mac and boy have we been busy!! There is SO much that my computer can much more than just 'panda cam' believe it or not.

SO pictures and stories are on the way as soon as I get the pictures uploaded to go with the stories. I also made a video that I think is funny...I just have to edit out the beginning and end where I set the camera up then scramble to shut it off.

Oh and for those of you not in Vancouver, it's raining like crazy and this is just the start....sigh.


Friday, September 28, 2007

...and then

....then you have some steak and the last post seems silly.

Oh feelings, you beast of burden.



I'm feeling a little low tonight.

Sometimes you think that you want to get to know people, and then you realize that maybe it's not that important.

Maybe I'll have to commit blogger-icide. I nixed my facebook account because it was boring, and I'm thinking that I should nix this thing because I'm expressing too many feelings.....and feelings just get annoying after awhile.


Tuesday, September 25, 2007


tonight I:

1. saw the smashing pumkins.....I can't even begin to explain all of the levels that is wrong on.

2. I commited facebook-icide. I am free!!!!

3. Wrote to a really old friend that I've recently re-connected with about the show as it was fitting and timely. We are old enough to have been friends BEFORE the internet was invented.

More later on all of the above.......riveting I know!

Thursday, September 20, 2007

RIP Trifective

One more thought before bed.

I enjoyed reading trifective for over a year now and was sad when the author felt it time to call it quits. Elaine Corden wrote Band Geek in the Westender, the only piece of writing I found in Vancouver (when I first moved here) worth getting my fingers all ink stained for. The first time I read one of her articles I laughed out loud and felt like I had made a friend in a city where friendships are not easily made.

It was such a pleasant surprise that we ended up living as neighbours in the Crosby building two years ago. We did indeed have much in common, important things like a soft spot for the stone roses, grilled cheese sandwiches, and genmaicha tea.

I just want to say thank you Elaine! Thank you for writing things that most people don't have the courage to express, and for doing it in a really funny way. Thank you for keeping East Van honest!

Wednesday, September 19, 2007

my dreams this week

1) I was going to a dinner party where I knew the host was serving burgers made out of his ex wife. I was an investigator and I was trying to get a burger back to the crime lab for testing.

There were all of these people at the dinner party eating hamburgers all over this giant, old house and none of them knew they were eating the hosts ex wife except for me. I tried to use the washroom to hide in, but the door wouldn't shut.

2) I can't remember number 2 anymore, but trust me it was weird! Like last month when I had a dream where I had to go to Dracula's castle to get my Drykorn pants. Dracula was this guy Stuart that works for the Canadian distributor for Drykorn. I was sneaking around the castle in an attempt to try to retrieve my pants wearing one of those god awful denim skirts that are made out of old jeans. I woke up before finding my pants.

Monday, September 17, 2007

I impart wisdom unto you

1. mean is funny
2. stupid is also funny

So far I got the stupid funny down like a second language. I'm still working on mean and I'm confident that with enough determination I will get there.

hugs and kittens

Thursday, September 13, 2007

things to do before I die

Have a baguette in Paris.I'll probably also have a cordon bleu and an espresso while I'm there. Oh, and check out the Louvre.

have a clam bake, but only people I like can come.

Perform a comedy routine on stage for a room full of strangers that I'll never have to see again.

Have sushi in Japan.....perhaps not made by a cat...but it's pretty cute...look, it's annoyed!

Tuesday, September 11, 2007

Bolsheviks for Elaine

As per Elaine Corden's request here are a couple of Bolshevicks.

Here's on I'm not entirely sure about...are they saying that the Bolsheviks got away with disposing of the Romanovs by using Scot Tissue Towels?

I'm not saying that Lenin looks like a giant phallus and that the world atlas behind him looks like a pair of balls........well actually that's exactly what I'm saying.

Anyone out ther read cyrillic? I think it says "workers of the world unite and bring me some caviar".

Saturday, September 08, 2007

my first joke....sans le punch line

What do Chernobyl forests........

......the Berlin Tiergarten......

....And Brazil have in common other than communist and fascist regimes or harboring fascists?


I think if aliens ever come to earth we should make them hamburgers as a show of peace.

I had a hamburger at Cascade tonight and it was sooooo goooood. I'd even say it was the best hamburger I've had in Vancouver.

Also, if you ever run out of toothpaste and need to go to the shoppers in Hell's gate Mall don't do it on a friday night. It's a bit freaky, you don't need to brush your teeth bad enough, believe me.


Thursday, September 06, 2007

personality shortage

Do you ever meet people that just rub you the wrong way? I find that I have an aversion to people with anemic personalities.

Vanilla greyhounds, morphing mice, drifting grey clouds and Eeyore desciples. Where do they come from? Are they partial souls? Are there not enough souls in the world for everyone to get a whole one? Or maybe there aren't enough personalities to go around so some people have to share?

Wednesday, September 05, 2007

to be funny

1. learn to be funny
2. learn to stuff emotions deep inside only to be accessed during times of self deprecating humor.
3. eliminate fear

I believe that is all I will need to become a stand up comedian. It would be easier if there was a funny school I could attend.

P.S I promise never to even joke about doing improve.

Friday, August 31, 2007

delicatly crafted story

If you have any love for me in your heart at all you will watch this film. And then if you have a lot of love for me you will write, or phone with your thoughts.

Thursday, August 30, 2007

I heart the CBC

This morning at 6:30am I was on the CBC radio. It's one of those things that I've had on my list of things to do before I die right between swim with dolphins and have a Cordon Bleu in Paris.( a dream I had even when I was a vegetarian).

They had me on the Early Edition sports segment as a 'fashion expert' to discuss the new Canucks jersey. My honest opinion is that it has nothing to do with fashion, but in terms of design there is way too much going on with the front logo, sleeve logos, Vancouver lettering. It looks like an insecure highschool girl with too much makeup. Which I wish I'd mentioned on the air. I did get to mention the whole time and place thing.

For those of you who have not been to Vancouver you would be shocked at how often people here wear sweat pants to nice restaurants and generally under dress for most occasions. It's getting a lot better lately and I am hoping my complaints about ill fitting jeans and yoga gear in public will soon be unnecessary.

I loved being in the CBC building which has clearly not had a face lift since it was built. It's like a time capsule and I love it. The hall ways are narrow and uncomfortable with that pepto pink that the government painted everything in the late '70's and early '80'd with right before burgundy became the 'it' colour in '82.

I particularly loved the brown '70's tiles. THey made me feel like I was in the Canada of my youth. I'm not being sarcastic here, I really felt a lot of comfort and warmth in the general colour scheme and design. I hope they never ever, ever, ever change it!

Which brings me back to the jersey, why did they even change it in the first place?

I know that one person heard me today. Thanks Taunya! You are the only friend I have that gets out of bed before the sun comes out. I hope you can tell me what I said later, I don't remember. It seems that before 11am I am not capable of being able to decifer what goes on in my head and what makes it out of my mouth (which also has happened when I've smoked pot which I don't do for that reason, as well as the fact that it smells like dirty hair)

Please forgive the rambeling and the poor's 8:30 am for god's sake and my fingers are typing even though my brain is on the snow chanel.

Tuesday, August 28, 2007

Random things

If you are ever feeling kind of blue I recommend that you go to your favourite cafe, have them make you a nice macchiato and pour yourself a sugar happy face. It'll brighten your day.

I've been promising steak club pictures and now I also have photos of Lena and Nick's wedding. Neither have ever missed a steak club meeting. In the meantime here is a photo of a sleeping beluga that was at the reception.

Oh and just incase you were all wondering, hell has frozen over. Below is Elaine's old apartment window being cleaned. There you go Elaine, get your skates ready.

Monday, July 30, 2007


New York City Whoohoo!!

Natsumi and I were bumped up to executive class for the worst leg of the flight which is from Here to Toronto.

Flying into New York is really amazing. These are photos that Natsumi took. I love that the building look like they are growing out of the earth like giant crystals in everywhich direction.

Elaine had stayed at a boutique hotel once that was clean, affordable and cute. Natsumi and I love it. The front desk has this guy working there that is so odd he seems fictional. He talks super slow with a slured lilt, it's very hard to describe. He seems as though he can only exists in the hotel and if he were to leave he'd just turn into a poof of smoke.

Art art...everywhere you look there is something someone has made that is beautiful.

Beautiful sunsets and streets.

....and hamburgers

This here is a photo of Jenny and Karl. They live in New York and they know where the best hamburgers are.

This is Milan. I met Karl and Milan in Prague about ten years ago with thier friend Bobby. I was in a cafe with some friends and we thought that they were giving us dirty looks. Later that evening after we were good and drunk we ran into Karl and Milan (was Bobby there?) on the street in another part of Prague and accused them of giving us dirty looks, they in turn said that we were giving them dirty looks. So we all decided to go out and have more beer. Why fight when you can have beer? And there folks is the reason that Czechs are run the risk of having your beer spill if you try to throw punches.

Natsumi is beautiful even while eating a hamburger the size of her head.

We wore the same shoes one day and told people who commented that we were in a dance troupe.

More beautiful buildings everywhere we looked.

.....And Breakfast.

This is the interior of a synagogue. Doesn't it just make you want to convert? I feel that way everytime I visit a historical holy place with such amazing love in the architecture. I once sat through an entire Sunday service in Prague just so I could stare out of a broken window.

Here is a little piece of New York that is more East Van then East Van. Kitten posters and fake wood pannel walls!? The only thing missing is a neckerchief.

The best pear Chocolate turnovers EVER sold here.

We ate really well, had lovely coffee and walked like we were trying to get to the ends of the earth. New York I love you, but I think I love you best as a visitor. It's a tough town and when you thank people they don't always know what to do with it. I think it's manage to strengthen my spine and harden me just enough to keep things interesting. I think I need to go back at least two more times to become as tough as I'd like to be.

I miss living in a more fluid and dense city sometimes. I like that no one really cares what you are doing in New York. You can wear a panda bear suit and no one would ask why. I'm still at odds with Vancouver at times, and am too negative about it as a whole although there are parts of it that I love. Anyhow, it was nice to use the sidewalks for walking for four days.